Monday, July 16, 2007

Expectations

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about what makes me do the things I do. For example, I have a tendency to beat myself up about stuff. Everywhere you look as a parent, there are people with opinions about how you're doing it. Experts, family members, friends, well-meaning strangers, not-so-well-meaning strangers...all of them would like to contribute to the way I raise my kids.

There are always going to be situations in which I, as Hannah and Audrey's mother, need counsel and support. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about the times I feel guilty when we stay in our pajamas until 2. Or when the laundry doesn't get put away for days. Or when we have a tough day and we watch movies all day. There's this thing in me that says, "what would people think if they knew?" Here's my new thought: I don't care. :)

I have to raise my kids the best way I know how. God gave my girls to me, not to anybody else. So, here are the new questions I'm asking:

Does it please God?
Does it please Nick?
Does it please me?

If it's not important to any of us, why should I carry that burden? There are circumstances in which I will need counsel particularly to figure out what pleases God, but opinions that come in from every direction are not helpful. Cutting down the input to only the people who matter will make motherhood more fun and less stressful. For that matter, so will cutting down on the things I personally have an opinion about. Really, that's just a good way to live - whether you have kids or not!

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