Family Principles from Scripture

I'm really loving this kind of thing right now. I remember one time asking God why, if raising children is so important, He didn't tell us more about how to do it. I have to laugh at myself about that now, as I am discovering the vast amounts He has to say on the subject!

The Importance of Our Job as Mothers

"Children are a public trust - Now, that work which is of most importance to society is the bringing-up and instruction of the children - in the school, certainly, but far more in the home, because it is more that anything else the home influences brought to bear upon the child that determine the character and career of the future man or woman. It is a great thing to be a parent: there is no promotion, no dignity, to compare with it."

-Charlotte Mason, "Home Education, Vol. 1" p. 1

It is often difficult, especially for those of us who stay at home with our kids, to feel purposeful, needed, useful as a mother. I'm not sure why this is, because it seems that even two generations ago it was not the case. But I have already established here in the past that I will make no impact larger than the one I make on my own children, my own family. So what if my training in music (or your training in...fill in the blank) is intended not to fill my own heart, or change the world as a whole, but ultimately to make an eternal impact on my own children and our home life? What if I create an atmosphere in my home where my children learn to live lives of worship? How much more impact will children who live lives of worship make, more than the person for whom I can facilitate a few minutes of encounter with God during a worship service (not to discount that, but obviously the impact will be less). What if this applies to all of our trades that we learned B.C. (before children)? Education, music, healthcare, business - whatever we did can be passed as a strength to our children through our willingness to give them those gifts...

Just something I'm thinking about...

Summer Evening

We had the best time outside tonight. I wish I could transport you to our backyard for the night. It's quiet here, and you hear the birds chirp and dogs bark from the other side of the ravine behind our neighbor's yard. The air smells sweet with pine needles and grass and wild flowers, and it's warm without being the slightest bit muggy or uncomfortable. Colorado summer evenings are heavenly.

Nick entertained Hannah by kicking her Backyardigans ball high into the air and knocking down dead tree branches for a good hour. Audrey played in the sandbox and looked at pine cones. I enjoyed my $3 garage sale find - a lounge chair.

We have everything we need, we're realizing. Our house isn't big, it isn't fancy, and it is far from perfect, but if we can have peace like this here, we are very blessed.

Encouragement

This has been kind of a tough week for me, for various reasons. Staci sent me this site last week, and it has provided so much encouragement to me this week, both spiritually and in the food area. I have never found any site that had recipes with only things we can all eat! Plus, she uses all natural sweeteners. It's amazing for me to be able to cook straight from a recipe, without tons of substitutions that may or may not work. Plus, her food is SO good.

Helen Keller

Have you seen this new picture of Helen Keller and Anne Sullivan that they just found?

I'm fascinated.

Like probably pretty much everybody, I read a biography of Helen Keller as a child. Did you remember that Sullivan was 20 years old when she started working with Keller? I didn't. As I look at the picture though, I have such deep questions.

What inspired this young girl to be so devoted to this child? I have a hard time being that devoted to my own children sometimes!

How did she see potential in a child who couldn't see or hear? Keller was angry, spoiled, hateful. She would hit and kick all the time. I give up on people far too quickly.

Keller is a testimony to being believed in. I mean, if someone had not believed she could learn, she would not have become the scholar she became. I'm just very baffled and inspired by Sullivan's devotion.

Who I Am In Christ

Years ago, they handed this out at church. I have hung onto it, and I thought I'd share it. Actually, what I do with this is put it inside a big ziplock bag and stick it to the wall of my shower. Then I read it every day.

Sometimes I can't get all the way through it because I become so overwhelmed with the difference between what Christ made me with His death, and what I actually live out. I force myself to finish it anyway. This is truth that will transform us.

This is not an end in itself, it is only the beginning. If we understand that our insecurities and sin have no control over us anymore because of Christ, we are then free to live for the good of others, like Kim's post that I linked to earlier. Insecurity and emotional pain are (usually) a result of forgetting who we are and wallowing in our own sin nature and selfishness. I'm preaching to myself here!

Let's quit that.

Secret Service

Glenn Packiam just started a new blog, which promises to be a great read. His second post is about the value of serving in secret, and I can't think of a more encouraging thing for stay-at-home moms to read.

I find it odd that when we encourage high school and college kids to find their purpose in life, that nothing is ever said about raising Godly families. What if we are called first not to the jungles of Africa, or the worship service stage, but to perform thousands of tiny unseen things that will help the next generation ultimately make decisions for Christ - creating an environment in our home that will facilitate our children knowing and loving God? THEN we can also go accomplish the other things our heart is drawn toward, either after our children are grown or while maintaining that environment at home.

God is cool

My friend Thea has such a cool story to tell that I asked her if I could share it. For the past several months, she's been dealing with a posterior placenta previa in her second pregnancy. If you don't understand previa, here's a place to read about it. She was scheduled for her second c-section next week. (And if you know anything about c-sections, each one you have makes it less and less likely that you will ever safely have a regular birth. The scar tissue can also cause miscarriages and all kind of stuff. There are people who have regular births after two, but it's not common and considered rather dangerous.) But, God worked a miracle here. This is her story:


"They agreed to do the final ultrasound today to see where things were in relation to the previa since I had been so adamant about checking at the last minute. Everyone was pretty certain nothing would have changed because it is nearly impossible for the posterior part of a uterus to grow enough in 2 weeks to give us the clearance we needed. Still, the doctor was kind and allowed the final ultrasound for my peace of mind.

The sonographer said the baby's head was too low for her to see the placenta and she kept saying "where is it?" "I don't see anything" so she finally got measurements and had to manually push the baby's head up and the placenta hadn't moved the 2.1 centimeters I had been praying for but the measurements show closer to 2.5-3 centimeters of movement which is beyond possible considering the max growth generally allows for a movement of .3cm per week. She kept measuring and measuring and brought the dr in and he didn't believe her, saying "What? That's impossible for it to move that much in 2 weeks..." and lo and behold...he saw the measurements for himself and cancelled the surgery. I told them it must be prayer since there's no other explanation - they went back and checked the older ultrasounds and sure enough it had moved - every medical study I can find and that I am aware of shows that at this point and later in pregnancy a posterior previa (what I have had) does not move...I cannot tell you how excited and relieved I was to leave scheduling an appointment for next week but cancelling a surgery. :) We have gone from a life-threatening situation worrying about hemmorhage every day and the concerns of a baby that may need time in the NICU to a healthy pregnancy with everything looking perfect...what an awesome God we serve :)

I am elated and now...praying for a safe and timely delivery of our little girl :)"

Good for the soul

These people just completed an international adoption of two boys from Africa. It's not their first adoption, but I am loving watching the process. What a gift to a child who needs love! I have never been particularly drawn to adoption, to be honest, but this kind of story makes me think about it for the first time.

Just ask for help!

I make is a habit to skim Foxnews.com every day. I like to know the major things going on. This is not a fun story to read, so don't read it unless you have the stomach for it today. Basically a mother killed her two toddlers in a store bathroom.

My thought was, why did she let it get to that point? I know that feeling, that one where if one more person makes one more noise, I may just go over the edge. This woman may very well have been a single mother. Her two children may have, in her mind, "ruined" every opportunity she might have otherwise had. I have no doubt that her life was incredibly hard.

What makes me sad though, is that nobody saw this coming and reached out to her. We moms gotta stick together. If we're having a day like that, we have to CALL somebody. If we see someone in that mode, we have to offer to take the kids, or just offer a cup of tea and some encouragement. We have to take breaks for ourselves, so that when we're done taking that break, we can be better mothers. I don't know what this looks like for you. Maybe it means re-prioritizing the family budget so you can have your house cleaned once a month (I did this once. I felt like a queen!). Maybe it means trading childcare with a friend so you can go sit at Starbucks and read for a couple of hours. Maybe it means explaining to your husband your intense need for a break so he can watch kids for a while while you Christmas shop. Maybe rather than doing anything else, you would rather sit in the bathtub and stare at the wall for an hour.

No matter what sounds fun to you, we have to make sure we do this! This is not selfish, this is our lives and the lives of our kids we're talking about, or at the very least our quality of life. If you don't have kids, offering to care for a friends' kids so they can take a break is HUGE. If I am finding myself snapping about every little thing, and I can't answer questions kindly, it usually means I am overdue for a break. For me, it also usually means I haven't read my Bible in a couple days. Watching TV, although enticing to me, doesn't fill me back up. So if I need a break and I choose to do that, I can count on not being much better off after that kind of a break. Spending some time talking to God makes a difference.

Our society is so isolated, but we (especially as Christians!) don't have to be. People have said for decades, "It takes a village to raise a child." Why would we ever think we could possibly do it alone?

Check!

*This is a post I started a few weeks ago and just finished. :)

So, my grandparents came into town last night. Since my Grampa isn't one to sit around, he volunteered himself (and my brother Nathan) to come over and work on projects around here all afternoon. Oh, my goodness. I cannot imagine how long it would have taken us to get all these things done. In addition, (while he was replacing light bulbs in the Jetta) he noticed the oil was very low, almost empty. Who knows what sort of car catastrophe we just avoided?

I feel like a miracle just happened in our lives. God answered our prayers and kept us safe and cared for, in ways we didn't expect.

Maybe I see it this way because of something I read in my Bible time this week.
In Deuteronomy 29, Moses is talking to the Israelites about their journey to the promised land.

"Your eyes have seen all that the Lord did in Egypt to Pharoah, to all his officials and to all his land. With your own eyes you saw those great trials, those miraculous signs and great wonders. But to this day the Lord has not given you a mind that understands or eyes that see or ears that hear. During the forty years that I led you through the desert, your clothes did not wear out, nor did the sandals on your feet. You ate no bread and drank no wine or other fermented drink. I did this so that you might know that I am the Lord your God."

They had just lived through some of the greatest miracles of all time, and they didn't even see them! You'd think at some point they would notice these things. But, how often do I go through life and not see the blessings all around me?

I have become convinced that the only way to survive good times in our lives is to be thankful people. By that I mean, when things are good, we tend to start to take the credit. I know I can get prideful and feel that I have had something to do with the good things in my life. It's easy to pull away from God until I "need" Him again. At that point, I crash and burn and start the process again. :) But, what if we could remain dependent on God, and thankful even through the good times? To surrender to God not only the things we can't control, but even the things we think we can! Talk about living God's will for our lives!

We've all heard the "attitude of gratitude" pithy sayings. I hate those. But, I'm talking about seeing everything in my life as a blessing. The turquoise Jeep with the cracked windshield we bought from my sister and her husband because we couldn't afford anything else? Well, it got us safely to church and back, down our little dirt road in 6 or 7 inches of snow today. This rather run-down house in the woods that we "happened across"? I feel like a queen in a castle with the snow outside, the candles burning, and a fresh carrot cake baking in the oven. My little girls are a ton of work, but today both of them said "I love you" to me, without being prompted, for the first time. Yes I know, Audrey is copying Hannah, but I don't care. Hannah saying that to me and then laying her head on my shoulder was the best gift I've had in years.

As easy as it is to be discontent (I know LOTS of discontent people, and struggle with it myself), we all need to be praying for "a mind that understands or eyes that see or ears that hear" the miracles that God is working in our lives. God answers prayers like that. As I have begun to pray this, I feel more content than I have in years.

Maybe as recently as a few months ago, I always felt that God was out to get me somehow. Maybe He was waiting to make my life really hard because it was "good for me." I doubted His heart toward me - doubted that He really wanted the best for me. The thing is, He says He wants the best for me, that He has a hope and a future for me. If He says that, then I can take my wandering thoughts and emotions and set them on that truth, trusting the truth over feelings. That kind of trust allows me to be truly thankful and content, without fear of the future.

It's a process, but this is what I'm learning right now...

Hope

If you're a mom, make time for this article today.