Monday, February 9, 2009


I'm a member of this group on Facebook and really enjoying the emails she sends. The latest one was about hospitality, and it was soooo good. Since it's not posted on the site anywhere, I'll post it here. It is written by Tammy Maltby. May we all be able to see hospitality this way...

A Simple Start:
A Few Thoughts to Jump Start Your Perspective Change on Hospitality.

1. Embrace hospitality as a message you give people about their value. My friend Phyllis Stanley coined that phrase and I just love it. It is not about impressing people. It’s quite the opposite. It is about wrapping your guests with comfort and care. Giving someone a message about their value means letting them know you’ve prepared for them, that they’ve been on your mind and heart, that you truly want to serve them. It’s being other centered rather than self-centered. That attitude takes practice, but it is well worth the investment. Not only will your guests’ lives be enriched. I promise you—yours will be too.

2. Let go of perfection. This is a point I’ll preach on again and again in this book because perfectionism it’s such a common hospitality killer—it will paralyze you every time. If you struggle with everything being perfect before you begin…you never will. Perfection is bondage—it will hold you back.

3. Convince yourself that comparison is the enemy. If your friend is amazing at entertaining, her house looks like a layout of Home and Garden, everything she touches turns to fun and beauty, and people flock to her gatherings…rejoice! She’s your friend and you can learn from her—but you are not her. I love what Emily Post had to say back in 1922: “To be a great hostess, don’t pretend to be other than what you are.” To effectively practice real hospitality, you must embrace who you are and find your own style.

4. Commit to try. Sometimes you will succeed splendidly, and other times a heartfelt laugh will be needed. It’s okay. You have no idea how many of those “attempts” I have lived through. Remember you will gain confidence with each endeavor. Nothing is ever a failure if you try and learn from it.

5. Most important, enjoy the ride. Promise yourself not to get so caught up in the business of living or even the details of hospitality that you miss the wonder of what is happening right under your nose. In all your efforts at hospitality, remember why you are doing what you are doing. You’re making memories, touching lives, doing the business of the gospel. You’re also connecting with the person you have always desired to be. You’re living with a perspective change—cherish the miracle!


  1. I love Tammy Maltby! Sounds like something out of 'Lifegiving.' Any particular reason for thinking about hospitality today? :o) I was sorry we didn't get much time together this weekend, but I'm so glad you came! Love you!

  2. It felt relevant after this weekend. Sometimes it's hard to come away from such a nice place back house. :)

    We loved being there. Wish we would have had more time too, but it went quick! Love you!

  3. Great stuff. Very appropriate, especially for what I'm dealing with presently. :-) Thanks for the thoughts.

  4. I love being the hostess and over the years I've learned from many amazing women in my life all the things listed in your post. And it's all true! Inviting someone into your "lived in" home is waaaay more fruitful than inviting someone in to your perfect, spotless house.